Happy Thanksgiving to my American friends reading this. I should warn you, this is going to be one of those “in the middle posts” which means it could, and likely will in an altered version, go on my muggle blog that’s in development or even Facebook, but, particularly this year, it also has a direct meaning to all of what I have written about here, so I thought I might do two versions. Or seven. Or twelve.
So, Rule Number 22? This goes back to my early days when for some reason (I think I saw it in a movie) I created a list of 27 rules to live my life by on or around my 16th birthday. Although it’s been edited or added to through the years, I carried this tattered piece of paper around in my wallet every day of my life until what is now known and the “great washer incident” of 2013 when I accidentally washed my wallet and disintegrated the already disintegrating list. Luckily, I had taken pictures of it and have those stored, but it’s not the same without that paper.
Anyway, the list was varied and included very important practical items to my 16 year old self such as “number 3 – always use a condom” to “number 7 – always wear white at night” to “number 18 – never put out an electrical fire with water” or even “number 4 – always wear socks that match your shirt”. There were some personal ones such as “number 14 – always remember that even on your worst days, there is someone way worse off than you” to “number 24 – always take care of Melissa” (my high school girlfriend who had a bad family). But, those things to say, the one rule that is most important tonight is “Number 22 – Never let Thanksgiving Day go past without writing your thanks for what was new that year”.
So, in context that fits this blog, I am obviously thankful for the inclusion of new friends in my life such as Thumper, who has opened so many doors for me (and one key orifice) in such a short time, to Belle for allowing him to explore who he is, and, of course, to Axel, my right arm, who I would not be anything without.
I am thankful for the technology that is allowing me to come out of my shell, literally around the world, through blog posts like these.
I am thankful to Apple, well, just because.
I am thankful to some of our politicians and government officials who have stepped up to support gay rights and provide equal protections and marriage benefits in certain states. I do not live in one of the “legal states” but thanks to Federal protection, the only thing that meant to me was getting a new driver’s license when I changed names took a bit more effort.
I am thankful for the countless men and women who fought, stood on street corners, and rallied so that I could get married and can now legally transfer property and assets and to the same men and women who, decades before, did that to get the world’s attention about HIV so that those of us coming up and out in the 90’s were educated and aware.
I am thankful for the kink community I have already met through here who shock me every day with their positive comments or the glimpses into their lives they allow me to see and the very nice things that say
I am thankful for Mr. S. Leathers who, well, if you ever go there, you will be eternally thankful too.
I am thankful for chastity devices that, well, you know.
I am thankful for my ability to communicate, read, understand, and process these feelings in my head that, once I unblocked them, have already started filling in the gaps in my soul. I think I am going to be great friends with these accepted feelings as the years roll along.
Finally, while I have already acknowledged him, the person, my final thanks right now are to Denying Thumper – the blog which most likely grew way more than ever intended, but it, as a collection of works, literally has changed my life and my thinking both before and after I banged the bunny behind it.
To my American friends, have a great, Holiday. To the rest of you, enjoy your Thursday.
P.S. – as an update, Melissa is still on the list and I have hired her at two spots during my career where she did and now is thriving and if any of you have kids in the 15-17 range, you should so suggest they do a list like this as they hear sage advice. At the time, I thought it was a whim thing, but I cannot tell you how many times that fucking list has made me happy, made me cry, or made my be a better man.