The Complaint About My Words – A Synopsis of The Drew Duality

This afternoon I got my first complaint.

I have gotten rude comments, questions, and compliments over the months, but never a complaint.

You see, Joelsub32 wrote me a rather eloquent message that said,  “Dude, your blog is supposed to be about you being a slave to your husband and owning a straight guy’s ass – which is hot. I looked and it’s all words and it’s about your life -not hot. Plus, who is Axel, Thumper and Stella? Too many names – also not hot.”

Well, what can I say, Joel? Have you heard of Tumblr?

Although I doubt Joel will ever read this, I decided to write a little synopsis here for new readers who, I hope can comprehend a bit more than Joelsub32.

The CliffsNotes of The Drew Duality:

The Blog: It’s true, it was supposed to be only about my submission to my husband and my dominant relationship with a bisexual married man who is locked in chastity and longed to be fucked by a man. While I think the original intend would be that this would be about a great deal of sexual details and less about life, what this has turned into is an outlet for me to explore my kink side through words, challenge myself at times, and chronicle my day to day life with “the husband” and the bisexual man (he’s far from straight, Joel), now often referred to simply as “the boyfriend”.

The blog has taken on a life of itself and is something I very much enjoy, so it’s going to continue and will evolve as my life does, as a husband, as a boyfriend, as a professional executive trainer, as a traveler, and, most importantly, as a switch who is navigating all of these waters as they flow together.  Finally, I write this blog as the man who is made up of all of those things and as a man who has honestly never been happier in his life as he comes to find a bit more peace in his soul every single day in accepting those things that drive his mind and his penis to great pleasure and as he finds some great people along the way.

The Husband (Axel): My partner of 17 years (and my legal husband of two), known only here as Axel, a name HE chose by the way, is an amazing man who I confessed my kink side to in 2008. Since that time it has been an evolving path of discovery often taking three steps forward and 117 back before repeating the process and starting again. Eventually, we made progress and are now at a spot where he wants and is taking more and more control of my life at home, which I happily give him (although due only just to life events, right now we are in one of the reverse series – but it’s all okay).

Our path took a great leap when we decided to open our relationship so that we could each explore things we wanted but were not getting at home. For Axel, he had a few dalliances that were only that and never amounted to anything more (but he is determined to find his own boyfriend soon). For me, this openness was really only symbolic until I met “the boyfriend” in October. At that time everything really exploded on both sides, with Axel deciding he wanted me to have a prince albert followed by chastity control and some structure at home, while also allowing me every freedom in the world I want or need with the boyfriend.  He is an amazing man and I am proud to share my life and my last name with him.

The Boyfriend (Thumper): Thumper really needs no introduction because of his incredible blog I was a huge fan of before we met (although I still am a huge fan too). He is a married, bisexual father whose wife keeps him locked in chastity 24/7 and has for over six years.  His full story and amazing blog can be found here, but we found each other after he wrote a post about wanting to be fucked by a man and I simply volunteered which was step one.  Step two was us clicking like long lost friends and realizing that we shared many unique things (and we continue to do so such as PA dates and times and, this week, I realized my ATM code is one he uses for something else – really, of all the numbers and codes in the world we use the same ones??) and that our kinks not only clicked, but they aligned almost perfectly like a delicately shaped plug designed for a gaping hole.

We started out as Dom/sub, Sir/boy, and I used many names for him publicly that I now use in private at the right times (except DILF -it’s just so fucking true to not be public) and had rules, challenges, and tasks which were followed by amazing sex, but after that we realized that our real lives were suffering at the expense of these activities and that the possibility of really being friends and knowing each other for the men we are would not be possible under the mask of me as always a Dom and him as always a sub. This new “freedom” has allowed him to serve as my kink mentor, female anatomy advisor, baseball coach, tech support hotline, my hole at a few specific times (see these posts), and, most importantly, my friend which is something I have grown to value tremendously.

All that said, we still fuck like bunnies and I still own his ass in private when we can (at least every month) and will continue to do so too!  Lucky for all of us is that he recaps those episodes as well!

The Dog (Stella): Stella is my girl and probably my favorite. She’s a spoiled terrier who has multiple beds (two heated and one cooled) and has a busier schedule than me and Axel combined. That said, she’s often referred to in the posts as an annoyance, but I love her dearly.

The Penis (Mr. Winky): RIP Mr. Winky, we now call you Cock.

So, that is where we stand, Joelsub32.  Care to send me another email complaining about words?


  1. Oh silly Drew, don’t you remember? We all write our blogs for the entertainment of others, it has nothing to do with us!

    What a dumbshit. I’m with Thumps, Fuck off dickwad, tyvmhand 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I was going to try and play devils advocate… But i can’t! Really, how hard is it to understand this blog?
    Keep doing exactly what you are doing Drew…. I love the real life stuff too and find it irritating that someone has questioned your blogging motives!

    Stella, Axel, Drew, Thumper and Belle… Its not rocket science!

    Wishing all of you a fabby-doozy Christmas btw! 😘🎄🎅🎄🎅🎄

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I agree completely that he was and is a dumb ass fucker but I really just found it funny that someone would actually complain (as a side note, I am in this weird mood of optimism which I think is because I am home for three weeks to “reset” myself, although responding to this at 3:10am is counter productive but sleep eludes me tonight).

    Also, in the last few days my site has been linked at several gay websites (two of which feature a LOT of porn) and I have seen a huge spike in viewers, so, I thought a recap would not be a bad idea since sometimes it’s hard to find the time to go backwards. Let’s consider this a holiday gift to the porn surfing crowd of sorts – ha.

    Besides, maybe it was just a Festivus Grievance.

    Liked by 3 people

      1. Says the guy up replying in the middle of the night who can’t sleep either. 🙂

        And yes dear CM, I do have a mouth and I'm not afraid to use it! 🙂


      2. I *was* up because of hormones. Drew can fix that for himself and still drinks too much caffeine before bedtime…

        I’m up now so I can go to the gym. *yawn*


      3. I was also up because after three months of intense travel, it’s hard adjusting to “home” and sleeping with someone, etc. Everything but the phone stays downstairs already, i just go to them -ha-

        And, yes, yes, the caffeine will slow down.

        I promise.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. LOL – Over the [mumble] years that I’ve been blogging, I’ve been grateful for the people who have told me that they’ve enjoyed my writings, and amused at the people who think that I’m some kind of free entertainment. Oh, wait – I am free entertainment, but sometimes I’ve run across a reader who took it personally when I’ve written about exercise/fitness, or posted HNT shots, or posted too many news articles instead of personal essays.

    I think there’s a line in a Vonnegut book to the effect of “The people, having been promised nothing, felt cheated in having received nothing.”


  5. Dude, watch your grammar! Sleep “eludes” you, not alludes you.
    Dumb question — how did Joel find you, if not through Thumper?
    All seriousness aside, please don’t stop writing!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Drew,

    Wow. I saw the link on Metal’s website and think I have been reading both blogs for a whole day. I enjoyed the above synopsis because it did help prime the newbie.

    I would like a similar situation but worry about emotionally becoming too attached. I know you both somewhat addressed this and worried about falling in love or whatever the term is early, but is it too personal for me to ask how you feel about that now?

    Please post daily. I love these. Merry Christmas.


    1. Thanks for the kind words. As for your question, it’s not too personal but not something I don’t want to spend much time on either. Simply put, that is not an option as one, neither of us are available and, two, thumper is not wired that way with men. Simple as that and both things make it easier, honestly.

      For me, yes, obviously I am wired for men and I suspect that in many ways he and I are or will be emotionally attached, but I’ve described this type of attachment as a “give you a kidney type of love” and I have that for everyone I hold close, but especially for those in my inner circle which is where this resides.

      Thanks again and welcome to the blog.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s