Intolerance By Power Washing

Good God it’s finally the weekend and it’s not 107 degrees at home. I want to run outside and play like a 32 year old, but, well, I have inside priorities like those two reports I have told you about that I am STILL procrastinating on. But, it looks to be a good weekend. Axel is home and in a good mood. I (think) Thumper’s back and should be gracing our social media pages soon. And, oh, most importantly, I have a massage in about two hours that will hopefully kick my creative juices in again for the writing assignments.

So, earlier this week I mentioned a new client that Axel has that had been troubling me a great deal. For the record, I need to once again clarify that I never know names, never know specifics, and never ask questions more than I know I am allowed to ask. I don’t want anyone here who has ever been to therapy to now feel that their therapist has told their dirty secrets to his or her spouse because, as spouses, we do know better. But, I do know generalities and usually, because they are the specific cases that cause him some consternation, he mentions a few from time to time which helps him to just talk a bit. But, in any case, I am telling you very general areas with a fact or two changed here or there just in case, though all this is anonymous anyway.

All that to say…

Earlier this week Axel had an eighteen year old kid come in who had been through a lot. This kid is gay but decided when he was sixteen to tell his parents that he was bisexual to “ease the news” which is something we have discussed here before and something that I feel is what leads to the bad reputation the bisexuals often have. But,having said that, it’s also something I fully understand having once had the mind and the penis of a sixteen year old. In this case, instead of his parents, who from what I would assume would be caucasian upper middle class suburbanites accepting him the way he was, his father took him outside and sprayed him with a high pressure power washer in an effort to “spray the gay away” while his mother watched. Apparently, he must have been so misguided that he thought of this as some sort of Biblical cleansing  procedure like they would have done in those days, you know, if they had had a Honda power washer and, well, petrol. In addition, I this went on continually until he was old enough to leave so he would not have “urges”.

This sickened me.

I can only ask Axel if the kid is going to be okay (which he says he will be) because this is one he had to turn over to the authorities who will now do whatever it is they can do. I have not asked this, but I assume since it’s in the past and since the kid is an adult I really doubt much can be done about it if anything, but again, that is just me wondering out loud and feeling for the kid.

This immediately made me think back to this post of Denying Thumper where Thump wrote about his son telling him he was bisexual and the contrast of the reactions between the two families who, from what I gather from Axel, would look very similar to each other if standing side by side. My initial thought was “what a lucky kid  (Thumper’s son) is because look how wonderful his parents were” which was then followed by a horrible dead feeling in my gut about what bastards that kid’s dad and mom are and how their fucking ignorance, lack of appropriate parenting, and, well, abuse of their child is probably going to scar him for life (I feel like if this happened then, there HAD to have been something in the past as well). Now, I am not saying Thumper’s kid is not lucky by any means, but I am just saying that they two experiences are so vastly different that it’s almost hard to comprehend as it’s such an extreme contrast of parenting, accepting, and love.

I will fully admit that this hit me harder BECAUSE the two families look alike. I am not sure, nor do I really care, if that paints me as a bad guy, but if that kid’s family had been dirt poor, uneducated, unskilled, or something of the like, I never could have forgiven them for this at all, but I might at least understand a bit more about it. I do know that men who drive Land Rovers  are just as capable of being intolerant and as bastardy as the next guy, but I guess I just don’t think about it and that needs to stop.

My inner activist has kicked in and I want to do something to protect that kid and kids like that in the future, so I am working on a few volunteers things my vanilla professional side can do for the small picture, but I think that, for the global one, any and all of us who read this blog and any like it where we do discuss sexual freedoms need to make sure we look out for these situations and these families to both help kids like this know that it does indeed get better and to get me the address of the parents so I can pack my power washer in my carry on (I so wish it was like Hermione’s purse) and drop by their house to spray their stupidity away, possibly until they bleed.


FYI – said kid has been accepted into college and has a boyfriend now, so things ARE looking up.


  1. As a resident of the true south aka Bible Belt, then story rings oh so close to home. I have two nephews that are gay. My FIL said well we just need to straighten him out! What with a hair straightener?! I have known this child was gay since we was a toddler and yet our parents still argue it’s a choice! What?! Why would someone choose to put themselves thru the intolerance that they must endure. My other nephew was beaten with a tire iron in his small town and left in the road to bleed to death. Luckily someone went back and got him. He was in a coma for 45 days. And still is relearning life. I just wish people could see them as people not as “gay men”. They put there pants on just like you do! And their gayness is not going to rub off on you! My heart breaks for this young man you are mentioning and I am glad he is making progress. (I am not a writer so this may not be as eloquently said as it should be but it comes from the heart!) I think it’s great you want to be a supporter for young people going thru these issues!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I, too, am a born and bred son of the South. My sister finally came out to us shortly after my Mom passed away back in 2003 and I could tell just how much of a relief it was for her. Unfortunately, even though my Dad still loves her dearly he constantly reminds her that her “lifestyle choice” is wrong. I have many dear friends and fraternity brothers from my college days who never came out until long after we all graduated. We all knew and accepted them anyway…hoping…they would realize it was okay.

    I wish the best for this young man.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ignorant monsters! How can anyone beat a kid (re: L Bell’s comment ) until he’s comatose? Someone should do that to him. I’m just too upset reading this. I hope the perp gets his just reward. I also hope both the victim from L Bell ‘s comment and Axel’s client will be okay. As for the parents, well some people are just too stupid to ever be helped.


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