Dear Mary:

Yesterday, my email greeted me with:

Name: Mary
Comment: Dear Drew:

I am very sorry to hear about all of the recent troubles you and Axel have had. I know this may not be a good question at this stage, but to what role do you believe that Thumper and your open marriage have had on Axel’s pain and possible addiction? Is the fact that your relationship with Thumper is clearly declining (based on how he talks to you on Twitter and doesn’t comment on or perhaps even read this blog only) something that played into your decision to divorce?

I will be praying for you,


Well, ain’t that a kicker, huh? This was not a comment but an actual email to me and from someone who apparently follows both this blog and my Twitter feed. That said, she apparently doesn’t follow either well, because, aside from my name, Thumper’s name, and the phrase “open marriage” she go EVERYTHING else wrong.

Is this what reading comprehension is now? I really can’t tell if this was an assault on me, Axel, Thumper, or just a general misguided message. But, to clarify, Axel and I are fine (never ever has the D word been used, Mary), Thumper and I are fine – though life is limiting our contact this month, and Axel does not have an addiction yet, though the signs are there so we are being careful. As for the pain, trust me, it’s a physical pain he feels, not emotional.

I just had a few minutes and thought I would share this because you should all be warned about what fools some of our online friends are. Mary, please just stop following me and, frankly, there are far more things in the world more worthy of prayer than me and Axel so, thank you, but you can take that elsewhere.

Finally, just a quick note to tell you all is good in the land of Drew and Axel. He spent today with one of the Scotts and even called me to tell me about the sex on his drive home. While I have to tell you that was a tad unusual for about 33 seconds, I loved every word and loved more that I could hear his smile through the bluetooth. This will all be just dandy. Trust me.

So, that’s it for me. I promise some more details soon, but I am about to fly home on a tiny wifi-less jet and, tomorrow, I am heading into the woods with some friends to go camping on our annual trip (gay camping, actually, big cabin, big TV, but no wifi or cell signal so primitive). See you next week.


  1. Um…picking jaw up from floor. Wtf? Apparently I have been reading a whole different set of posts and tweets than she has.

    Glad to hear that things are continuing to be good in the land of Drew and Axel. Your posts are always so real and honest. I love reading them. It’s nice to see the glimpses of your lives together.

    Enjoy your camping trip. It sounds closer to my style than the tent…but the no wifi and cell would make me a bit twitchy… 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You and Thumper seriously get the best/worst comments and emails ever.

    I wonder if there’s some strange churchy outreach group that scours the net and looks for people to pray for? Because if there is, I’d like to know about it so I can point and laugh at them for being total fucking idiots.

    I do believe the cool kids call that glamping! 😉 Have a great time!

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Since I have, infrequently, left comments here I thought I would just mention that the email Drew refers to was not Sent by me. I know from reading both blogs ( but not really Twitter, not enough time) that all relationships sound strong and fulfilling who doesn’t have rocky patches and curve ball life throws at us. It is the open and honest blogs that show what relationships can be that keep me reading.

    Enjoy your ‘gay camping’ trip and look forward to your next blog.

    I’m now going to change my screen name because I don’t want to be associated with that email.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh no! When you write me your name shows up differently so I didn’t even think about that! I’m so sorry and I could have changed her name. But, for the record, never ever once did I think she was you. And also for the record, traders, this Mary, the only one who counts in the scheme of things, immediate wrote me a nice email of support for Axel offering some hip advice. Ugh. Makes me dislike negative Mary more now!


  4. You scare the shit out of the closet muggles.

    To realize their world is just a box they’ve settled into has got to be unsettling at best.

    You, Axle, Belle, Thumper and the Scotts are jumping up and down laughing outside their box of safety.

    …terrifying 😉


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