The one about my husband.

“Where is your wedding ring, Drew? You have posted pictures of you and the boy and, in some, you don’t have your wedding ring on and you don’t talk about Axel. Is everything okay?”

That is what greeted me in my direct messages one morning a week or so ago. It’s a valid question, I guess, but I find it funny that someone would pay close enough attention to notice if I had my wedding ring on or not (though Steelwerks did make our rings so they should get attention from this crowd I suspect) But, I guess some do and I also guess some have wondered why jack and I don’t talk as much about Axel, my husband, also known as “Daddy” to jack.

So, let’s remedy that and talk about my husband…

First, all is fine. He’s good. We are good. The three are good. I work from home and, for whatever reason, I have never worn my wedding ring at home. It goes on the table by the door with my wallet and keys – when I had keys. If it helps, I almost always have a cockring on that Axel gave me, so he’s represented even on me if my left hand is naked. If he wanted me to wear that ring or even if he wanted my cock to be locked, I’d do it in a heartbeat, but he’s the guy who in our 24 years has only worn his ring when he feels we are at something fancy, which is a rarity in our world these days, and my locked cock only makes him want to see me ejaculate which somewhat defeats the purpose. But, to be fair, it is true that I don’t talk about him much and that is by design because of how he has chosen to participate in our online versions of our kinky life and I respect the fuck out of that.

For those new, or who don’t remember when I introduced him here nine years ago (fuck, Thumper, nine years?), Axel is an incredible man. He’s tall, quiet, and could be described as a “watcher” as he takes in everything he sees and might not mention it until months later. We are the same age and met in our late 20’s when we both had full heads of hair, 30″ waists, and dicks that would never betray us when needed (or often when not needed). He has four or five degrees – which mean we should say Dr. Ax, but we won’t – and is a therapist to some very high risk, low profile, highly troubled younger people – a position that offers few mental, monetary, or emotional highs. He is still an athlete at heart, but a big injury15 or so years ago slowed him down and an added autoimmune disease has added to the issue. Life has thrown him a few more challenges to him than we expected, but it’s just something we get through together so we adjusted our dream retirement a bit and it no longer includes a six story beach house, though I guess we could get an elevator – hmmmm. Meeting jack also adjusted the dream retirement, but more on that later.

I know that most could care less about the previous paragraph and are more interested in the how we found ourselves with chastity obsessions and in possession of a slave, but I felt like I needed to paint the picture. Ax may argue this, but while he has many things he is into, kink, or my version of it, is just not something he feels or naturally has in his soul like I do. While he might tell you he’s kinky, in theory, his kinks are, shall we say without the intention of kink shaming, more mild, and could come with a side of vanilla pudding compared to things we see here and on Twitter (again, no shaming). Had he met someone who also had those same kinks, they might have had an amazing pudding filled sex life, but he didn’t, because he met me – the fucking pervert who can still shock him with some of the things I can conjure up in my fantasy world (I kinda love that) though he still swears he is not really shocked – but the immediate pale face and grimace usually gives it away. I find that cute. But, after about 15 years of trying my hardest to suppress my pervert side, we had a talk one day and I spilled the all the contents of my locked leather and titanium Pandora’s box. And he was AMAZING.

At first, he and I tried to kink him up and I tried to embrace my sub side with him, but it wasn’t natural, then the switch days with Thumper came in, and then, fast forward a bit more, we met jack.

Yes, I did just gloss over what could probably fill 19 separate blog posts about how we came to agreements, how we came to be open-ish, how it felt to watch him go on a date for the first time or what he felt like the first time I told him I had done F with T, but this isn’t about that. This is about the now and all of those things can be answered in many of the hundreds of previous posts on this blog. Why I write this now is to answer that question and to say that we are good, he is good, and he does not star in the online part of this drama because it is 100% his choice to not be a featured player in these or the twitter pics and posts. I used to try to make him change his mind or show him this or that and that and this, but at some point I realized that he is an adult with his own twitter account and if he wanted to partake he would. I also realize that, for me, who works alone, travels alone, and could actually go a day without talking to someone not on a screen, I enjoy sharing, learning and and just being a pervert with (mostly) complete strangers who enlighten my day almost every day. For Ax and what his day to day is like, the clutter of Twitter and the back and forth do not go hand in hand and it causes more stress than it’s worth. I will say that he enjoys the fact that I enjoy the blog and Twitter and it’s not uncommon at all when he does something he doesn’t like or thinks I might not like (like have to go to bed at 7:45 on horribly stressful/painful days) he will usually start his sentence with something like “go on and post to your peeps about my lazy ass doing….” or something similar and I say something back like “you know I never would” and then we chuckle like it’s not the 7,000th time we have had that conversation while I roll my eyes until he’s out of sight before secretly swooning a bit making the dogs swear they will not tell on me. You know, those things.

Now, the other obvious question is does jack distract from my marriage or add to it? And, for me and Ax, jack has been a godsend in so many ways. We are not a thruple officially, though maybe we are. There are lines that are drawn in what and where we do things and who is at the table or the cage though these lines were less discussed and more just evolved. This is just mostly because Ax is 100% supportive and endorses whatever it is we want to do, but it’s just not his thing to the extent it is ours, so we have found a system in place that works. In many ways, it boils down to I provide the pain and he provides the aftercare. It’s not uncommon for me to provide jack with a very red ass and then go downstairs where he will cuddle on the couch with Ax while I do some work or something on the other side of the room. When I travel, the two of them have each other on days when jack can come by and I absolutely love it and have no idea what they do together, nor do I care. I don’t ask because it’s their time and they deserve that (you know, as long as jack has done his chores). All that said, I need to say it wasn’t just simple to find this spot nor has maintaining it been automatic. I have made Ax mad, jealous or hurt his feelings and he has done the same to me, but we talk, figure out what caused what and don’t do it again until, you know, we do do it again. For jack, this is one of those situations where he is like a child and Mom and Dad want more time with him or less time or whatever. He waits until we work it out and, like a good slave, just does what we need. With that, he always does what we need. That boy has such a knack for knowing that it is scary at times, though I know it is also an indication of good training!

And, with that, I should wrap up as I have talked far more about Axel than he will be comfortable with reading. The bottom line is we are great and this little threesome, whatever we call it and whoever locks who, makes me smile about 2,717 times a day. So, please ignore my ringless finger in future naked hand pics, all is good in this kinky place.


  1. Damn, I am glad to read you every now and then (unfortunately not as regularly as I should/want to)

    Once again a beautiful insight and I was swooning several times
    Thank you Sir


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s