Hello from the end (of our) of Mid Atlantic Leather Weekend (www.leatherweekend.com) where Axel and I lost our gay fetish event virginity. It was a wonderful experience and we enjoyed meeting new friends and seeing the sights, both good and bad. Plus, we did a damn lot of shopping. More on that later – of course.
For the last 48 hours, within 100 feet of us there were men of all ages dressed in complete latex bodysuits, full leather gear, and incredible uniforms. Additionally, within those same confines were men clad only in the most minimal of strings which, by technicality, allowed them to stay within the event rules. Some were in collars. Some attached to leashes. Most others just “were”. Many of these men looked amazing in these outfits while many of these men did not. The thing that impressed me most was that nobody gave a fuck. These guys just embraced who they were and it didn’t matter to them what anyone else thought (about the fetish, that is, as they had clearly put time and money into the gear and it showed!) . There is a lesson in that for all of us to learn, myself included.
In addition, we met a few new couples and their friends and learned that we are not that unusual in our open marriage nor are our friends who do not have the open adjective. There was such an interesting mix of dynamics. Couples who compete to see which can get the greatest number of partners over the weekend. Couples who like to share a third just on these weekends. Couples that are part of a polyamorous 24/7 world. Couples that live, eat, and breathe Dom/sub. And, couples that have been together for 20+ years without having ever strayed from each other. It didn’t matter because nobody judges here and everyone is accepting of whatever wild story you may tell them, even if they involve women. This was especially illustrated when we were talking to two rubbermen. I stepped away for something and came back to hear Axel say something like, “No, they try for once a month at least and, his wife has him locked in steel chastity, so Drew never gets to use the penis. It belongs to his wife. I just loan him Drew’s.” The two rubbery guys were just fascinated, which made me laugh, because of all the fetishy things in the room, the idea of me fucking a locked straight guy got their attention. Go figure.
Something also new was that I got to meet several people who I have talked to online for many years and to shake their hands and give them a hug, which, for the record, I do really really well. Most are familiar with my current life and I enjoyed introducing them to Axel and showing off pictures of Thumper.
However, one particular friend stood out.
For sake of this blog, I will call him Griffin, but this is a man who has impressed me for years with his acceptance of his kink and his open relationship with his partner. In addition, he has a boyfriend (technically he’s a pup, for here we will say the b word) who, like my b word, lives in another city. They have been together/collared for over four years and the boyfriend has been married to his husband for over twenty. Griffin and the boyfriend’s husbands are good friends and their relationship works quite well. It was a joy to watch them interact and to see actual, real life proof that situations like mine, Axel’s and Thumper’s CAN and DO work. And, Griffin is just nice. He’s handsome, intelligent, and has a caring nature that exuded throughout the entire event space. Plus, he told me he reads this blog and Denying Thumper regularly, so you know he’s good, right?
Seriously, Griffin, if you are reading this, know that meeting you was the highlight of my weekend and I look very forward to seeing you again.
All of that was leathery, rubbery and wonderful, but some of the most important things from the weekend didn’t happen in the event space but in our hotel room. Of course, with a leading sentence like that I think you are likely to be getting ready to hear about stickiness, palpitations, and orgasms, but, aside from a little licking here and a little sucking there, we did not have coitus. Not once. What we did have, however, was intense amounts of private time, much of it naked and in bed, that consisted of holding, of touching, of examining, and of making Axel and I exactly what makes us such a great pairing. The sex will come, hopefully later tonight fyi, but we examined more of what he is looking for in his outside “interest” and what that will likely look like. He even had an opportunity to go break in a new paddle we bought for me when I need it and for Thumper when he does, but his potential disciplinee hung out with us in the giant group of people just a bit too long and said three or four words too many, and that was the end of the erection for Axel. But, aside from the fact he will likely have to break it in on me now, it served up a great conversation that is actually big enough to be a blog post by itself, so I will be writing that this week.
Also, we talked about Thumper. A lot. He asked more questions about what we do together than he had in the past and I volunteered more specific information than I had in the past. Ironically, we talked about him as the person way more than him as the sexual object, but that’s what we wanted from day one, and I cannot tell you how good it feels to just have no secrets.
On the shopping front, I have already mentioned the paddle and you have seen the new belt and belt buckle that cost far more than something like that should, but it was fascinating and fun to have an entire event space turned into a shopping market of nothing but kinky things from some of the best vendors in the business. I did not see a single place that was not thriving and I love that. In addition to those things, we bought a few T-shirts, a uniform shirt for me, a book or two, and some new gear that I am not ready to talk about at the end of an already long post (plus, it will be best to surprise the bunny when he is blindfolded as two of them are going to HURT)
Despite these things, some of our best shopping was out in DC on Saturday morning where we had an authentic Mexican breakfast and then ran into a Farmer’s Market of sorts. Axel saw a small piece of art that he said “that reminds me of Thumper and what he represents” and, well, before I really realized what was going on, my husband was buying my boyfriend a present (and a few other pieces for our house and his office). It’s way cool and I suspect you will see it on DT one day, but that’s enough of that for now aside from the fact that evidently Facebook friending leads to gift buying, at least when I am in the middle. In all seriousness, when Axel finds who he is looking for, I will be picking him up something too. It’s like a fucked up version of etiquette for outside partners that Miss Manners was too disgusted to write.
Finally, at the end of last night I was honored to be able to meet Dan Savage himself and shake his hand and thank him for all the advice right before making him stand for the obligatory picture with me. I told him the story of Axel, who was taking the picture, and Thumper, who I have to say he said “the chastity blogger? I’ve quoted him. So, you are the new guy?” (or something very similar) which made me feel like royalty and almost pee my pants in excitement for when I can tell Thumper (who is still in the woods and out of reach).
And, that was last night. Today was far more boring by comparison.
(Note, here are a few pictures from last evening that both show everything and nothing at all including your first veiled glimpse at Axel and his new boots and my cool as fuck belt).