Aboot two months ago I wrote this post about my trip to Canada to visit Chris the artist and owner of Steelwerks Extreme to be measured for my very own custom chastity device. That device arrived on my doorstep two days ago and the following is a bit aboot this Canadian piece of art, how it came to be, and what it’s like to install it on oneself for the very first time. I honestly haven’t worn it enough yet to give it a full review, but I can say right now that if I were to write one right now, it would be glowing. There is plenty of time in the months ahead to talk about how we use it, as we are not a couple that fits the traditional chastity lifestyle, but for now, it’s all about the titanium.


The device itself is called the “Axel” named both after my husband who wanted this device for me and re-named because I have a really bad memory of a woman named Tiffany and I did not want to think about that every time I touched my penis. In reality, it’s a slightly modified version of the Steelwerks Extreme “Tiffany” that is made up of a steel tube with a titanium cap and a set of titanium cock rings which include a scrotal cuff that, according to Chris, is like having a “gentle hand tugging your balls all day“. The modifications are slight, but they include a slot that is cut into the bottom of the cap to allow my curved barbell PA insert to connect on the outside of the device, thus rendering it absolutely inescapable, though the scrotal cuff pretty much does that too. In addition, we altered the colors of the trim which includes a two toned cap that is blue on the inside, giving a really nice peek of color viewed from the front.

When I ordered this with Chris, I was cautious about trying not to demand too much change to his original art, but that was a worry I soon forgot as he was in touch with me on every single detail of the design, the cutting, the measuring, and the final product. My device took about two months from start to finish, but in reality, he had a two week vacation and a complete move of his shop from one location to another, so some of that time was spent simply waiting, which I knew about from the outset, by the way. In all honesty, months back when Chris and I designed my barbell, we began a friendship that bled over into this product execution, but I really think our relationship had very little to do with the outcome as I know he spends just as much time with everyone he designs for at each and every step (but I am sure I am just more delightful). He’s slow, detailed, driven and often cranky, but the amount of time, energy and precision that goes into each device is simply unbelievable and, in the end, you get a piece of jewelry that happens to keep you from touching your own jewels.



Throughout the process, Chris used the word “install” over and over again and it took until it was in my hands and about to be on my man parts, before I really understood that this is not the average chastity device. His patented S screws are a force to be reckoned with and they are everywhere locking that bad boy down. When I opened the box, I was actually perplexed about how to actually put it on and Chris being Chris offered to FaceTime with me to help me step by step. Of course, me being me, I could not wait that extra ten minutes it was going to take him, so I started without him and was able to get 90 percent of it on before he called. He was really impressed and I was really proud until I dropped the tiniest of the silver S screws right on to my kitchen floor where it not only blended in with the silver slate floor, it rolled under the big silver gas range that is nearly impossible to get under. So, poor Chris got to talk to me AND watch me as I laid in the floor with my naked ass in the air trying desperately to find it, which I did, right after I had given up.

With the tiny screw now in hand, he guided me through the final installation steps right until at the very last we realized that my existing curved barbell was not long enough to go through the bottom to lock into place. I was troubled by this, but he quickly pointed out that it can just stay inside the cage until we get that sorted out and then everything was right as rain once again. In fact, I rather like it in the cage, but for the stream of urine I want to have, I am looking forward to getting the new one soon.


I have struggled with the actual wording to use here, because the fit is, to use the standard phrase, “like a glove”. With the steel tube centered between the titanium ends, the weight is centered on the shaft creating a balance I actually never realized was missing from my previous devices. I can only liken it to the feeling you get driving an old school RWD BMW that has a perfect 50/50 weight balance on a twisty two lane going way to fast.

The actual fit while on is just perfect. The rings are a tad smaller than what I was used to and the first night I wore it I had a bit of burning, but with the right amount of lube underneath that went away fast. I wore it the first night with just the regular ring and the second night with the ring and cuff and I have to say, contrary to what I thought it would be, I like the way the one with the cuff feels much better. It really is like that gentle hand tugging and I like how it tucks my balls away a bit bringing the shaft down to almost the perfect spot when standing or sitting.

Those S Screws

The beauty of the S screw is in its simplicity because its simply a screw with a s pattern on the top. Since I already had two keys from the barbell, the Axel did not come with any extra, a devious trick from Chris that is actually only right as we can’t have them just laying around. Once the screws are in place, they allow the device to be 100 percent secure while also allowing flexibility in the metal, something else I had not experienced with previous devices. This. Device. Is. Secure.

That said, when the mood strikes, it’s as detailed to take off as it is to get on and, when sent to remove it to have a, well,  rendezvous, the mood can almost run out in the time it takes to remove which, I guess, is the cruel trick of the Steelwerks experience.


Over the next few weeks I will be wearing it in various forms before any solid rules are put in place regarding its use. With my life existing almost as much in the air as it does on the ground, one of the beauties of this design is that I can wear the ring and cuff, locked on, 24/7 and get that “ownership” feeling I crave without the actual cage. I say this because this amount of titanium will pass through airport security, I hope.


After this NSFW warning jump, of course.


Over the last year,  I think there has not been a week that has gone by that I have not evolved a wee bit in my sexuality or in my viewpoints about the sexuality of others. Though he has directly been responsible for much of this evolution, I am not contributing all of this to Thumper, but enough to call his role extremely significant. The rest has come through this blog and my Twitter fun as I have met a few great people in person via that but, with a few more, I feel like I have just amazing friends out there who I am just waiting to meet someday. I get around so it will happen. I hope. It’s through all these eyes that mine have been opened more and more and when I sit back and think about where I am now, I can only think that it’s just a great “place” to be living my life.

With that, two things are on my mind this week: My switchiness and vaginas. Yes, I said vagina.

Since I am there, let’s start with a talk about vaginas and my new less adverse reaction to the idea of them. Now we all know the double gold star shit so I am not going through that again, but if you read Denying Thumper and this post, you know that last week I sat around with one very much confirmed bisexual man, you know, my boyfriend that I have sex with, and another heteroflexible man, who I am determined to become his new gay best friend (because every mostly straight guy should have one), listening to them go on and on and on about the wonderfulness of pussy and what they like to do to, with, and in them. This was an experience that was absolutely new to me and, the Drew from a year ago, would have mentally cupped his ears and sang something really gay like “I Will Survive” in his head over and over again until they stopped, but the new Drew didn’t. I listened. I questioned. I envisioned. And, in doing so, I realized I was no longer as pussy-phobic – which is fine, but that shit had to stop right there.

Fast forward a few days and I was in my hotel room doing my typical evening of multitasking which involves ironing, eating, baseball on the Apple TV, texting with those I adore, and either working, perving, or learning via my Macbook. This particular night was a pervy one, so I found myself Tumbling on Thumper’s portfolio and came across this picture that, well, rather excited me. My head was screaming at me like “WTF dude” while my dick, who at the time was safely locked away in a steel tube, was trying to rise to the occasion like he has just seen a troop of naked firemen walking through his bedroom. I did not know what to do because, as dumb as it might sound, in 45 years that had never happened. Not once. Sure I looked at the the Playboys hidden in the woods with my friends growing up, but what they didn’t know was I had found the one and only naked picture of a man in each magazine and had focused my energy there which allowed me to avoid speculation (though it was later pointed out that my lack of the use of the word “titties” was a significant clue for my best friend at the time). I was confused. I was perplexed. I was scared. So, like any good boyfriend would do, I immediately texted Thumper for comfort and words of support because clearly, clearly with this one image I was now bisexual or something and I would do nothing but scare Axel if I sent that filth to him.

Being his boyfriendly self, Thump immediately texted back with something soothing like “which picture was it?“, you know, like THAT was the crisis at hand here. I sent it to him and he came back with other supporting words like “that one will do it” and then tweeted all about my personal penile betrayal as he clearly didn’t understand how awful this arousal was for me. Admittedly, the tweets did turn to about how funny it would be to all the people who thought I was turning him gay if he turned me bisexual and, well, I have to admit that would be pretty funny, though, for the record, it hasn’t happened.

Once the shock was over and the nightmare averted, I started thinking that what this weirdness did was cause me to really take a hard look, pun intended, at the fact that, in the grand scheme of sexuality, it’s been a very foolish thing for me to have had such a closed mind about female sexuality and the, apparently, beautiful things women can do with their lady parts. I admit to now having a much greater curiosity about what it would be like to have sex with a woman and, while I still have zero interest in doing so, I have to tell you that I think I would be awful at it even if I got past my initial squee’d out reaction. I say this based purely on my sexual interactions with Thumper and how we go about things. He is gentle, kind, and has a light touch that I have never felt with another man which usually causes me to say “harder, faster, rougher” leaving him saying something like “that’s just what I am used to”. For me, when I am doing something as simple as rubbing his shoulders or legs, I look over to see a contorted face of pain because I am squeezing the living hell out of him which is how I have always done it with every man I have been with and, apparently, this is not how Belle does it. Even an act as simple as kissing has a difference as he has taught me how to be lighter, better, and more gentle which is one of several things Axel appreciates me doing differently throughout the past year.

While what I have described above sounds like it’s a bad blooper reel of gay sex gone wrong, it’s not like that at all in the reality and you have read those posts to prove that. But, it does show give he and I have a chance that many don’t, which is to be able to take very intimate look into the other side of sexuality and the inner workings of things like touch, taste, time and learn from it to make us each better partners to our primaries. For me, I have been wasting that view by immediately moving it to the weird place in my mind that blocked such thoughts or images and I am going to stop that and allow myself to learn and grow for me and the two who I have the privilege of seeing naked often.

So, that’s it for the vaginas part and it went longer than I expected, so I have decided to do a follow up post later today about my new switch revelations and how that has almost completely evolved from where I started, especially as Axel now takes a bit more control of the penis I carry around.

Yet again, hello from 30 something thousand feet in the air somewhere over the Canadian border. Quite a different flight tonight because, to my right in seat 1D, sits Thumper who is reading a really thick book and stewing because the headrest on the seat isn’t all bendy and doesn’t cradle his head the way he would like. I was able to, somehow, finagle us upgrades both to and fro, but, alas, there are no bendy headrests so “the whole trip is a disaster”, according to the rabbit.

Actually, the trip has been a really good one and, even as we are winding down and heading back to Minneapolis where he will go home and I will go to an airport hotel to sleep before heading back east tomorrow for work, we are still quietly smiling. Most likely for different reasons, but still, it’s a nice feeling.

We arrived early evening last night after a delay and went straight to find some food and then head to the hotel to watch a ballgame and, well, get naked. We made it through an inning or two before the nakedness happened for both of us (he has his hotel rules, you know) and we began what would become a few hours of play with one attempted bed time in the middle that was ruined by me having one post orgasm erection that would not stop. I felt like I was 23 again and, well, since it was there…. (Now we all know I  don’t really write about the sex stuff with us here but within a few days the story will get out one way or another.)

Sleep never really happened for both of us, though apparently I got more than he did because that flu from the last two weeks left me really stuffy and snoring like a boar at times which I suspect is new to him, and, after “releasing” two times in two hours, I was rather relaxed. However, something about being fucked, looking at Tumblr and having his nipples abused revved him up and he wasn’t really out until about 5am. Of course, not knowing this I woke him at 6 because my erection wanted to say hello again and, well, let’s just say he is tired tonight but still in a non cranky place which I appreciate.

So, I am writing this tonight as a slightly more kinky Drew than I was this morning because I now own latex jocks, briefs, and a fitted hood that is, well, just beautiful. In addition, I have ordered my very own piece of art from Steelwerks Extreme that will be just absolutely fucking amazing. I decided to go with a Tiffany model which is half titanium and half stainless with an extra cock ring and scrotal cuff for those days when I want to shake it up a bit. This device will work in tandom with my locking curved barbell, Chris, the owner and artist in residence at Steelwerks, designed for me earlier in the summer. I went there today with the idea of changing this, changing that, and customizing it to be my own, but, in the end, Thumper gave me some advice that doing so to that would be, in a way, like me adding hood scoops or stripes to my beloved X5m, which immediately told me to stop and just go with what the expert had designed and proven to be a success. Chris has a few muggle things happening in life over the next few weeks, so I have told him to not worry about any deadline and just get it to me when he can, which will likely be around the first of November which is perfect as it allows me and Axel to get our planned groove going in a the interim.

After this, he took us to a friend of us his that designs latex fetish wear to see the process and the inventory and, holy fuck, I may be a rubber man one day. This stuff was brilliant and the smell was simply intoxicating. I surely see a bad hotel carpet picture coming later in the week for these items.

Finally, another note about Steelwerks Extreme because I simply cannot begin to tell you how high quality both the work and the man who makes it are. Chris, who himself is a piece of walking art via ink, has a magic combination of kindness, charm, geekiness, and a magical abilitity to mix a leather collar with a white collar which helps me further blend my worlds together. He allowed us to hold and touch an older device that he uses for show and a personal device he uses for, well, not my business, and it was truly like holding some rare piece of art that you have only seen in a museum. As I have noted, it’s expensive in the way a Mercedes is compared to a Mazda, but after being here today, any thought I had about whether the investment would be worth it was out the window in minutes. While this was happening, the three of us spent the day talking about kinks, dicks, politics, and, more – in this case “more” specifically means their frequent talk about lady parts and how much fun it is to play with “down there”. Gross. But, despite that pussy stuff, we had a great day that is going to help me on multiple levels in the future.